Oh my, February is almost over. This past week we had a little break from all the snow and the ice and the cold...and then it came right on back. Not so fast spring, it's still winter! It's okay though, cuz that's what boots were made for :]
My goal at the moment is to write a blog a month. I was just realizing how different life is, how much I live my life month to month, instead of event to event like I used to. Even with scrap booking, I just finished my one from last year and then one for this year if just going to look different than my other ones have, because a new phase of life is hitting. Weddings, babies, engagements, etc. You know the drill.
So many people told me that there would be this phase of my life where everyone was getting married and having babies, it's crazy to see it all come into play. Exciting too :]
This month for me has been a lot of about searching to find peace and learning how to love. My life is slightly crazy right now, my family is about to change because my Grandma is moving in. Our house is changing in prepration for her. The kids are a part of my activities and we're currently balancing two vehicles. I am working more which is good for the pocket but not always good for the mind. I am working on getting back into to school, but it's not a picnic.
Trying to find peace in chaos is hhhhhharrrrrrrddd. Taking time with Jesus, medidating on His word and writing down my thoughts is hard!! When you have a mini list buzzing around in your head almost constantly of where your money should go and who you need to take where. I definitely can't do it a lone. That's where I find my peace. Knowing that Jesus is in control, not me. It's not always fun that way either, but it's the only thing I can do.
Ahem, love. Yes, yes February is the "love" month. I have known this my whole life because my birthday begins this month and there is already pink and red everything every where. What I have really found this month though is that I need to love like Jesus does. No brainer right? Oh well lol. I need to love withough expecting anything in return. It's the hardest thing because you don't know if you will ever be loved back. But it's not the point of loving. Crazy huh? I think so! Granted, I have a lot of people who love me, who show me, who tell me, etc. But even then, people can't love you perfectly either. Flip-side of the coin. You can't love perfectly, people can't love you perfectly.
I am so thankful I serve a God who gives countless amount of grace, because I am asking him to change my heart, and speak truth and true love into my heart. So that when I pour out of my own heart, it's really just pouring out the love He has already placed there, which I never come up empty in if I ask for it.
If you're reading this right now, or if you think about it later, pray for me in these areas. It's so hard, but I desire to know the peace of God and to feel His love for me.
Love you guys :]
